Painful Truths
by dryingtears
Summary: It was the pain of realizing that the only person that truly loved him...was gone. It was the pain of realizing that she was gone...without knowing that he loved her with his twisted heart. [SasuSaku]
1. Painful Truths

**Painful Truths**  
_Written dryingtears_

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Naruto.

* * *

_Eight years...eight years of bitterness. _

Sakura's eyes slowly opened, her body tired and unable to move from her lack of energy and chakra. Her teammate, Naruto, lay on the other side of her, his body in no better condition than hers. She could feel sweat trickling down her skin, the saltiness mixing in with her dry blood. Her body was covered in her own pool of blood, and her left leg was cut deeply.

_Damn...my chakra...I used too much in battle...and I had to heal Naruto..._

The two of them were sent on another mission to retrieve Uchiha Sasuke. Even after eight years, squads were still being sent to retrieve him. Sakura only wished that he would realize how much everyone _had _cared for him at the village. It was his _home_. He had friends; he had (annoying) fan girls. The only thing he _didn't _have was his blood family.

...But he still had his _'foster' _family. Sakura, Naruto, Kakashi-sensei.

They were more than a team...

...they were _family_.

On their way to the Sound, they were ambushed by Sound ninja, who presumably had already known about the two coming. It had become casual routine for Konoha to send ninja to the Sound to bring _him _back.

...It wasn't a smart move to keep sending squads, because more and more ninja were dying on failed missions.

Sakura bit her bottom lip in anger, frustrated she could do no more than lean back and prepare for death. Naruto was completely unconscious; he needed his rest, anyway. They were in the middle of a dense forest, where they wouldn't be stumbled upon by Konoha nin until at _least _a few weeks. She took a deep sigh, her eyes slowly drooping in fatigue.

Every breath she took lead to more pain in her body. She knew there was no way she would be able to make it back to her home. She shut her eyes with bitterness, forcing herself to see the darkness. Tears began to fall from her shut eyes, as the realization of _dying _and not being able to _see _him dawned upon her.

_Would he know she still loved him?_

_Would he know how much pain he made her suffer?_

Her heart began to beat faster, and she struggled to return it back to normal. The more her heart beat, the more pain she felt from not only her wounds, but from _emptiness_.

Eight years ago, a small void began to form in her heart; the place where _he _would always be was replaced with a hole when she realized that there was _no _way he would return. As time passed, the void grew larger and larger, until every breath intake brought her pain.

_Heartache._

Her breaths became more jagged as her crying became sobbing. Tears began pouring down her cheeks, and pain became increasingly painful the more she sobbed.

_Stop...crying...Sakura! You'll just...die...!_

Her eyes slowly opened, and she turned to face her resting teammate. His breaths were calm and normal; his eyes closed in a serene slumber. A small smile played on Sakura's lips as she looked away. He would be able to fulfill his dream; he would be able to find happiness once he got back home alive. She closed her eyes once more, her breaths becoming easier and her sobs dying down.

Sakura could feel her life slowly leaving her. Her own sticky liquid stained her clothes, making her thoughts wander to how disgusting the blood felt against her skin. She knew she only had a few more hours left to live in the world. Her breaths were growing sharper and sharper, and her heart began paining and stressing more and more.

_So this is what it feels like..._

Her heart beat suddenly picked up to a dangerous pace for her condition, and she winced in pain.

_This is what it feels like..._

More blood began to gush from her wounds, but she refrained from crying out in pain. And as she took her last breaths, she only wished that the pain in her heart would go away.

_...The shattering truth..._

_...that she was alone._

* * *

Konoha was once more clad in black, white flowers held in pale hands, eyes downcast and red. A white casket was lying before them; inside, the corpse of one of the most loved ninja in the village lay in forever slumber. The flowers were dropped one by one, everyone proceeding in silence, reciting the routine condolences, and quickly leaving to avoid the ghastly air about them. 

The more brave and more caring remained there for what seemed like eternity. Tears were flowing out of the women's eyes, the men comforting their loved ones, holding back their tears to remain strong. Whispers of sadness and sorrow filled the air; there was no trace of hope that could be brought up in the wind. Slowly, when they knew they could no longer buy more time, they left, their footsteps in perfect sync. As they walked farther and farther apart from one of their closest, their _beloved _late friend, they could feel their heart pain with ache.

_It was the shattering truth..._

_...that she was gone._

The Godaime Tsunade stood before the white casket, her eyes downcast like the others, her fists tightly clenched. She knew it was her mistake for sending so many ninja to retrieve the Uchiha. The Uchiha was _not _worth Sakura's life; her life was far too valuable to waste on such a man. Tears were streaming down from her eyes like raging waterfalls.

It was her fault...

…that her beloved student, her beloved _daughter_…

...was dead.

She slowly turned, knowing that the more she lingered, the more pain she would feel, and what's worse, the more she would show it.

The Hokage was not allowed to show worry or sadness.

Emotions are a weakness.

And in times of utter despair...they can only hope that they get the right release, before they themselves are driven to silent insanity.

* * *

Sasuke slowly walked into the village gates, his body dirtied and his clothes wrinkled. His hardened onyx eyes scanned his surroundings; Konoha was eerily silent today. He noticed that no villager was walking among the streets, no birds were chirping. Had something tragic happened?

He slowly made his way to the Hokage Tower, where he would make his return known, where he would take punishment for "betraying his village", and where he would finally able to make the feeling of homesickness go away. On his way there, he decided to stop by the monument where his old sensei would always be spending his time away. The black monument seemed to mix in with the uncanny personality of the day.

As he approached the monument, he saw the figure of his sensei. Nothing about him had changed, and Sasuke was silently thankful for that. His sensei seemed to sense his presence, and he slowly turned around, his one visible eye widened in shock.

"...Sasuke?"

His voice was harsh and hardened, like he had been sobbing for hours on end. His visible eye was drooping more than ever, and Sasuke could sense that he had, in fact, been crying. Silently, he approached his sensei, and stood next to him, his eyes scanning the list of names.

"...What a tragic day to be back, Sasuke."

Sasuke averted his gaze from the monument and looked into his sensei's visible eye. So his instincts were right; something tragic _had _happened. Catching the unsaid question in his student's eyes, he slowly turned and faced the monument once more, a wall of water beginning to form at his eyes.

"..."

He remained silent. He would let his student figure out what had happened; he would let his student figure out exactly how much _she _had cared about him.

Sasuke grew frustrated with the silence. It was unusual; usually, he would be begging at the gods' feet, begging for people to shut up around him so he could concentrate. But today..._something _about today...was different.

"...Just keep looking at the monument. Maybe you'll see it. ...And if you would excuse me, Sasuke, I need to go speak with Naruto. When you're finished here, perhaps you would go visit the Hokage. But knowing you, you probably were on your way, before you decided to drop by. Probably to see if anyone had passed away, I assume. Until later, Sasuke."

Giving his sensei a nod, his eyes continued to scan the names of the monument as his sensei disappeared. It seemed that the monument was running out of room; there were so many new names engraved. As he reached the last name, the most current name, his eyes widened, and his heart seemed to stop.

_Haruno Sakura._

He couldn't bear to see that name engraved on the black stone. He pumped chakra to his legs, and he ran.

_Uchiha Sasuke..._

_...was running away._

* * *

"...So you're back, I see." 

He was sitting down in the chair before the Hokage, his eyes staring at his feet. He sensed her piercing eyes bear into him, but he didn't flinch. He was used to piercing eyes trying to intimidate him. But the only ones that ever did...were those of his brother.

"Did you fulfill your goals?"

It seemed that even she was unusual. He had heard about her from the Sound; she was outgoing, loud, and dangerous when drunk. But today, her voice was being forced to sound omnipotent; today, her mind was forcing her to sound strong.

"...Hn."

"We're not going to get anywhere if you answer with an undecipherable answer. Now, _answer, _Uchiha. I have _no time _to mess around."

He glanced up, and saw that she was dead serious. Her chestnut eyes were reddened, and they had lost all traces of softness and sympathy.

"Yes. Orochimaru _and _Uchiha Itachi are dead."

Tsunade nodded in agreement, and she closed her eyes in deep thought.

"The Council won't stand for your return. But...upon knowing that you have done our village a great favor...you will be put on an eight-month probation. Your every move will be monitored by the ANBU. I'll overrule the Council...and I _will _take necessary steps to ensure that you will be able to live here in safety. And if you'll excuse me, I need some time...alone."

Sasuke stared at her as he stared back. His punishment was _nothing _like he imagined it to be. But he wasn't complaining; if his every movement was monitored by the ANBU, it meant that any annoying fan girls he had left wouldn't bother him. He would have peace and quiet.

"Sasuke...is there anything else on your mind? If not, then I need to get some things done."

His onyx eyes narrowed in anger, and his lips were formed in a deep frown. He held his face in his hands, slowly trying to calm his rage. Slowly, ever so slowly, he removed his hands, and he stared calmly into her chestnut orbs.

"Is she dead?"

He noticed her eyes widen in surprise, and she closed her chestnut orbs, as if trying to force the forming tears back.

"..."

He stood up forcefully, nearly breaking the chair he sat on with his anger. He began to stomp around, looking for something to punch dead. If only Naruto were there.

"She was killed on a mission sent to retrieve you," Tsunade softly replied.

This seemed to make his mind snap. His eyes widened in extreme anger, and he began to grip the chair's arm tightly, trying to calm himself before somebody in the village would end up dead.

"I'm sorry, Sasuke. She is dead. Naruto brought her back in his arms. According to him, she died from loss of blood, and she was too exhausted to heal her wounds, as most of her chakra was spent in battle and healing Naruto."

The wooden chair arm snapped in two, and Sasuke didn't mind that his hand was probably full of splinters. His onyx eyes flashed into the dangerous Sharingan, the pupils swirling.

"You're lying to me, Hokage-sama! Sakura is not dead. She _can't _be dead!"

He clenched his fists tightly, his nails biting into his skin. Blood slowly began to trickle down his palm.

"Sasuke, she's gone."

His mind could not bear hearing those words. The pain he was causing to his body became numb to him, and the only pain he was able to feel...

_...was knowing that the only person that truly loved him in this world..._

_...was gone._

"I won't believe you! She's not dead!"

And then he disappeared, in a wave of fury and confusion.

Tsunade sadly stared at where he had stood, a few drops of blood on her floors.

_If only you knew how much she wanted to see you..._

* * *

Sasuke stood at the monument, his fingers gently tracing over her name. Her name was an illusion. He would not believe her name was there, he _could _not believe her name was there. Nothing in the world would make him believe that she was dead... 

She was the only person that truly loved him.

_And he would not believe that the only person..._

_...Was gone._

His heart ached. _Why had he never felt this pain before? What did it mean...?_

His already hardened onyx eyes had lost all emotion in them. There was no hope, there was no light. It was only darkness, the darkness of realizing that the hardest thing to believe was the truth.

"Teme! The rumors were true! TEME!"

It was that annoying voice.

The one that never failed to get on his nerves.

He turned around, and found that his former teammate was still as hyperactive as ever. He still wore orange, but he was thankful that his teammate had at _least _picked up _some _fashion sense. His hair was still blond, and his cerulean eyes were still crashing with life.

His teammate ran towards him, and stopped when he was face to face. Naruto stared at every inch of Sasuke's face, his eyes hardening when he began to reminisce.

"Teme, Sakura-chan's dead."

Sasuke's eyes once again flashed the color of blood as the topic was once again brought up. The three pupils swirled, and he bit his bottom lip in frustration.

"Sakura is _not _dead! What is wrong with everyone here?"

Naruto frowned, a wave of sympathy washing out of his eyes. His frown deepened when he realized that his former teammate and his eternal rival was gone.

_...Do you really love her, Teme? Are you...still oblivious?_

* * *

Sasuke was angry. He was _very _angry. Why was everyone calling her dead? Didn't she deserve any credit for her accomplishments? 

...That's right. He knew.

In the Sound, he heard of the famous Haruno Sakura and Uzumaki Naruto.

Both were trained under the Sannin, just like him.

Not realizing where his legs were taking him, he forced them to stop. It was eerie. They took him...to the graveyard. Looking down at gravestone before him, he fell in shock. Tears began to fall from his eyes, letting loose those that he had kept in from the time his clan was massacred. His heart began to ache more and more, and he clenched his fists in pain.

_Haruno Sakura._

...So it was true?

He was not living in an illusion?

_...Haruno Sakura…_

_...The one that truly cared..._

_...and the only one that he had loved..._

_Was gone?_

"Sakura! SAKURA!" He screamed.

His piercing baritone caused the crows to fly out of the trees, the other visitors to look up in surprise.

"Sakura! You're not…you _can't..." _

His eyes widened in shock and realization that his nightmare...was real. Tears no longer fell at a slow rate, they began to stream down from his eyes. It was an odd sensation for him; it has been at least thirteen years since he last cried. But this odd release brought him some comfort. The pain that he had held in was let loose; the pain that she was gone made him ache and cry more and more.

_And for once in his life..._

_Uchiha Sasuke...showed pain..._

_The pain of loneliness…_

_...and the painful realization..._

_That Haruno Sakura..._

_...The one he truly loved..._

_Was gone..._

_...Not knowing..._

_...That he truly loved her...with his twisted heart._

* * *

Thank you for reading! I really hoped you liked it. (: There will be a sequel to this, and it will most likely be uploaded sometime later tonight or tomorrow. :D (It will be added as a chapter to this story xD) 

Anyway, reviews are much appreciated! Thanks again for reading! Until next time!


	2. Painful Truths: Part 2

**Painful Truths**  
_Written by dryingtears_

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Naruto.

**A/N**: This is the sequel to the first chapter. :D

* * *

"_Sasuke-sensei! You're late again!" _

He gave his students a small smile. Over the years, he learned to show minimal emotion. The loss of his former teammate and lover had taught him one important thing: _show the people you love and care for that you truly love and care for them...before they fade without knowing._

"_Sasuke-sensei! What's your excuse this time?" _

He looked at the three youngsters standing before him. It was just like his old team: a hyperactive, potentially dangerous boy, the village heartthrob of the year award winner that came with a lot of stamina, and the potentially strong girl with excellent chakra control. It seemed that time liked to replay itself, and the way it had replayed for him was pleasing.

"_Did you get lost on 'the path of life' again, or something?"_

He smiled. After passing his Chuunin exams, and thereafter passing the Jounin exams, he became a Jounin, and cared for three little bundles of joy. Over his lifetime, he was an ANBU captain, and was made famous by his successful mission of completely destroying the Sound. A few years later, after the peak of his career simmered down into that of a regular ANBU, he decided to take a few years off, as seeing the sight of so much blood had wounded him.

"_Sasuke-sensei!" _

However, no matter how annoying his bundles of joy would get, they were his children that he would never have. They brightened up his day when he was feeling dismal and morose, and they reminded him of his childhood that he cherished. No matter how strict or crazy they thought he was, he knew they respected him and loved him.

"_HELLOO? Sasuke-sensei! Answer us!" _

He remained silent, purposely getting on their nerves. It made him smile and lighten up when he was reminded of his childhood. His old Kakashi-sensei and his perverted Icha Icha books, Naruto and his amusing stupidity.

...But to him, Sakura was a different story.

She was his love. She was his hope. She was his light.

He admit that it took a while for him to accept that his love, his light, his _hope _was gone.

...but now, a long years later, when he was aging faster and faster, and when he knew his time would come sooner than he thought, he was able to accept that she was indeed gone.

And through the days, weeks, and months, he came to understand that if she saw him acting morose and despondent, she would _not _be happy in her eternal resting place. So he cheered up, and soon began to learn how to love again.

And he knew as well as she did, that he would never love another woman in his life.

She was forever his, and he forever hers.

"_Sasuke-sensei! Stop ignoring us! We need to train..." _

He looked at his three little ninja, their foreheads covered with their newly acquired headbands. He smiled. Their eyes were shimmering with happiness and joy, and their lives were not as painful as his. When he had taken the responsibility of this team, he promised that he would _never _let what had happened to _his _Team 7, happen to them. He would be there to protect them.

_He would be there when they needed him the most. _

He would teach them like _his _old sensei did; teamwork was more valuable than strength and power alone. He smiled. Over the time he had spent with these children, he found they completely understood the teamwork concept better than he had. Kakashi-sensei would surely be proud.

...And about the old man?

Hatake Kakashi passed on a while ago, as his age had caught up with him. Sasuke's smile widened; he knew the old man would be smiling down upon him behind that mask of his. And he envied Kakashi's presence with Sakura.

...But he was glad. It was time for him to pass on; a silent insanity was tearing him apart inside. He would finally be able to be reunited with the people that he held dear.

"_Sasuke-sensei! This isn't fun anymore! We have to get ready for the Chuunin Exams, remember?"_

He smiled at them once more, and nodded, ruffling his raven hair with one of his hands. They smiled and jumped with joy, happy they could get some of their intense training done.

...How he loved how enthusiastic they were for some intense training.

He would let them get stronger, yes.

...But if anything, he would _not _allow them to be like him.

"_Well, let's go then, Sasuke-sensei!" _

He smiled and turned around, waiting for them to walk closer before fully leaving their meeting spot on the bridge. He heard their synchronized footsteps and began walking, every step bringing him closer to happiness.

"_Yay! Thank you, Sasuke-sensei!" _

His smile grew wider, and he couldn't help but let out a soft chuckle. His three children smiled, all talking and enjoying each other's presence. They were a happy family.

_They were a team._

* * *

He was old, and it was time for him to pass on. He was lying on his deathbed, his skin losing pigments of color by the second. It was his time to pass on. It was his time to be _reunited. _

The team that he had fathered sat beside him. They became the _new _Sannin. They were his pride and joy, and he loved them with all his heart.

"_Oh, Sasuke-sensei. It's alright, you'll make it." _

He let a gentle smile play on his lips, and he felt her hand clasp his.

"_Yeah, Sasuke-sensei! Even the Hokage is here! Be happy old Mr. Heartthrob found time in his schedule!" _

"_Shut up, idiot. Being Hokage isn't as easy as you think it is. You should try it someday. ...Oh, that's right, you can't, because for one, you're pretty weak. And for two, you're going to die before me! Just wait till you get reincarnated, why don't you?" _

His smile grew wider as his two children were arguing.

"_Shut up, guys! Sasuke-sensei needs peace and quiet!" _

He began to chuckle, his laughs beginning to pain his throat. He coughed, and blood slowly began to trickle down from the side of his mouth.

"_Sasuke-sensei, don't worry! You'll make it!" _

He closed his old onyx eyes, feeling the warmth of his children emit into his body. He felt his daughter's hand slowly squeeze his, and he gently squeezed back.

His daughter...

_Haru._

She was so much like the old and the new Sakura. She was strong, she was naïve, she was caring and gentle.

His two sons...

_Sanosuke._

The current Hokage, and the old village heartthrob. He was strong, but he was cold. He was just like Sasuke in so many ways.

_Shinji._

One of the strongest and most feared ANBU captains, and Sanosuke's most trusted advisor. He was the old and new Naruto, being both hyperactive and a wee bit arrogant and rushed.

_Shinji and Sanosuke?_

Eternal rivals, forever battling for dominance in power. They were just like Naruto and Sasuke in their golden childhood. And he knew that they were brothers; a bond so strong that nothing could tear them apart.

_...Haru and Sanosuke?_

...Equals love. The Sasuke and Sakura couple that was never able to be.

"_Oh, Sasuke-sensei..."_

He listened intently as Haru whispered his name.

"_...You'll...make it..." _

He let another smile play on his lips. She knew as well as he did that his pulse was dying, and that it was nearly time for him to go. Her fragile hand grasped his, tears escaping through her gentle eyes.

"...Haru...don't cry...remember...what I told you...about crying?"

She began to sob, and buried her face in her 'father's' chest. He gently embraced her.

"_Oh, Sasuke-sensei! You told me...that you hated to see me cry. But how can I keep them in, when you're dying?" _

He let a toothy grin escape onto his lips, and he began to gently laugh. He felt his three children smile through their tears.

"I'll...watch over you, always."

He felt her nod, and he knew he was taking his last breaths.

And on his very last one, he felt light filter through his shut eyes, and he saw a hand outstretched, waiting for his to hold it. The light slowly faded, and he smiled when he saw the figure. He took the hand, and he saw the figure smile. He returned the smile, and before completely walking into the gates of eternal peace, he took one last look through his shut onyx eyes at his three children. And with one bittersweet loving fatherly glance, he turned around.

"_You waited for me?" _

A gentle whisper he has longed to hear once more.

"_I don't have to wait any longer. I love you."_

* * *

_And now...she would know that he had always loved her.  
...And he'd be able to show it.  
_

* * *

"Oh...Sano-kun, Sasuke-sensei's gone!" 

Gentle arms wrapped around her, trying to comfort her with his touch.

"Shh, Haru-chan. Don't cry. Sasuke-sensei wouldn't like it if he was looking up upon us now."

Her sobs began to die down, and she let a smile form on her rosy lips.

"Hai, Sano-kun. ...Mm, what's this?"

She looked over and saw a small folded paper clasped in her late sensei's hand. She gently reached over and brought the cold hand to hers, and took the folded paper.

"Ne, Haru-chan! You should open it! Maybe it's something important to Sasuke-sensei!"

"...Hai, Shinji-kun."

She unfolded the pieces of paper, and when she read the words, written in messy cursive, her heart stopped and new tears fell from her eyes.

* * *

_Wait for me Sakura. I'm almost there._

* * *

Well, thank you for reading! I don't know if I'll make this into a oneshot collection or not, but whatever. xD 


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